A Year of Failed Technology

For a year I have been whining that technology failed me. Can't imagine the amount of misfortune I've dealt with related to gadgets. If there was a rating classification it would be severe. Here's the beef:

September 2009 - My Old Dell model got stolen at the 3rd floor of the hospital.

November 2009 - Diana, my handy dandy external drive crashed three days right before an important case presentation along with a lifetime of pictures, movies and mp3s

May 2010 - I accidentally dropped by phone and it tumbled down ten steps into oblivion for which it's LCD broke.

July 5, 2010 - Double whammy. I lost my iPod (BFF) and my camera. Some ungrateful patient stole it. Well I hope you'll be crippled by your malady and I really mean it!

July 31, 2010 - I lost a phone for the nth time.

I'm officially going old fashioned. The only gadget I will have is Griffin and my laptop.

So there, a laptop, a hard drive, an Ipod, a camera and two phones. I am cursed and I can't seem to shake it off. Jeez, I'm such a drama queen.

Crossing Over

In exactly ten days from now I will be celebrating another birthday. I will be a year older. And I will be 26 years old. Meaning I already existed quarter of a century. I am no longer young anymore or borderline adult but I am already an adult. You see I have this philosophy in which when you are younger than 25 but still in your early 20's you can still call yourself young and be irresponsible and immature. When you are 25 you are in the border. You have a right to still consider yourself as young or you can start to by being a matured adult. I went with the former.

This is the third year in a row in which I have no plans of celebrating. Right now I think birthdays are overrated. My point is you don't have to celebrate on that one single day of turning one year older but on the whole year as a whole of being that age. Not just on that natal day but on any day you want to as long as you try to live fully. Then again this year I'm not in the mood again to celebrate. I just don't see anything worth celebrating right away. And at the same time spontaneity excites me. I'll be off duty that day so we will see whatever happens. I'm up for anything. All I know is I'm not really in the mood to be with a bunch of people on that day. I'll be doing an anti-birthday thing, No cakes, no candles, no wishes, maybe some shopping and binge drinking and eating. I am on a quest to make it as ordinary as possible.

Here's to turning a year older but definitely not wiser as I would have liked.

Out with the Old, In with the New

After a week of canvassing and contemplating I finally decided to get a new camera. I've concluded that a camera is way cheaper and will be useful compared to an iPod which I might be getting next month for my birthday or next year. I am playing Mr. Practical right now.

I bought a Kodak C142 easy share camera since it's very affordable. At a price of 4,995, along with the camera, there is a free SD card of 2GB, a camera case, a charger, two rechargeable lithium batteries and two disposable alkaline batteries. Not bad for starters. Plus it's also 10 mega pixels and so simple to use with face detection, image stabilizer and user friendly. It is also stylish and light in its blood red color. I'm happy and I vow to take care of this camera even if I have to fend off a robber in a knife fight because it's mine, mine mine! This is the first time that I've bought something entirely on my own - from my own pocket and savings. I am doing this Project of taking one picture a day in honor of my camera so that I'll have an excuse to use the camera every day just to make the most out of it and life as well.

When I paid the cashier I got additional discount and I only paid for everything for 4,750. Double happy me. So to anybody looking for a cheap for than decent but stylish camera I highly recommend this one. Just something to keep for the mean time before we can afford a DSLR.

So meet Griffin. Named after Griffin from "Griffin and Sabine" one of my favorite books that I tremendously enjoyed.

Irrational Impulsivity

Must be the grueling 24 hour duty at the ER last night but speaking about it in retrospect compared to the day we had over 31 admissions, last duty wasn't even that bad.

As I was taking a shower today at 2 pm, I suddenly thought about quitting and finding another career path. I know very irrational right? I was thinking that may I had enough and I don't want to save lives anymore. I don't want to learn to prolong someone's existence in the world. In that moment I decided I had enough medicine for a lifetime. Me want new career now!

In my fantasy I then decided to fly to Manila and get a job as a call center agent or a sales man and then I'd party every weekend. I then self-slapped myself, thinking I thought I am so over that phase. Hey even working in a laboratory as a medical technician seems tempting and way better than practicing to become a doctor.

I kept pondering whether everything will be worth it in the future - the financial investment, the sacrifices and the time. I have feel like I've totally wasted my twenties - the best decade to experience the world. I should be traveling at least the Philippines right now or pursuing some stylish hobby like photography, art or theater. Instead I'm stuck at a hospital sweating trying to deal with different people - some rude and some just don't get it about maladies and diseases and offering my services for free food. Oh well I smell quarter life crises coming. It's hard to be passionate about something when the odds are constantly against your favor biting you in the ass - treating patients on limited resources.

Another idea I've come up is I'd fly to Australia and work as a waiter or get a blue collar job and then see the city and it's art when I'm off and read classics and modern fiction by the Sydney Harbor.

Right I'm now bordering on delusional.

Then I've just realized that maybe these thoughts are repercussions of losing my camera and my iPod and then the compensation I had to put up with.

or I really do want a new career right now.

Bad Day

Since starting PGI-ship 6 weeks ago, every day and everything has been smooth sailing so far. Despite the long hours, overworked job descriptions and humid ER setting I have never complained and have never minded such herculean effort. I looked at things as if the glass was half-full and used optimism as my ultimate armor to battle. In short I enjoyed it.

Until today, there has to be a bleep in the radar or a small glitch on the car right? I overslept as usual. I almost do every morning considering that I relied on the fact that the workplace is 15 minutes maximum from our house even by jeepney if the traffic is light and my seniors are very lenient on punctuality. Imagine, 15 minutes after 7:30, so far I've not been marked tardy. So I hurriedly took a shower, ate breakfast and packed things. I didn't mean to but I put my black pouch containing my Ipod and my camera. My bestfriend and my great companion. I had second thoughts on bringing it to work. But what the heck, I did anyway since I was pre-empting I might be bored. So I put it in my little bag along with other books that might come handy in the Out Patient Department. In short that was the last time I would see those two. My attention was fully grabbed my interviewing patients that I forgot to check my bag once in a while. The next thing I know they were gone. So I was kidding myself and went back thinking, maybe I was not able to bring em. But unfortunately I did. So there goes. Maybe a patient took it or a worker from the hospital I can't really be sure. All I know is its gone and forever will be. Well first of all it's really my fault. I shouldn't be bringing gadgets like that to work and second at least I learned something from this. When I got home it really sinked in that I have lost and I think its right time I mourn contrary to the poker face I showed.

So in short for the next two months or I will be starving myself. Im thinking of getting an iPod again maybe a cheaper one. A nano perhaps or a camera whichever might be useful. Or not. I could probably live PGI year without both but I'll probably want at least one.

I'll be punishing myself so that means I'll only go out once every two weeks, less alcohol intake, study, amuse myself with the books I have accumulated in here which means no more book shopping as well and no birthday slash tequila party this year. I have decided that there is no reason to celebrate. I'll live and continue living.

As Frank Sinatra said "That's Life" and which I supplement "You Win Some, You Lose Some but Life has to Suck Sometimes".

Summer of 2010

This is so far the only year where I get to do this retrospective post in which I did it on the same year on the actual day summer ended. Well technically I am no longer a student so first day of classes does not affect me now at all. I'm just posting this today since this is the first day of classes of most students here in the city and the rest of the country as well. So today officially summer ends. But the weather is still humid but its improving. I admit though I detest the start of the rainy season, I conclude that we need rain - to replenish those empty dams as source of hydraulic power.

Well to sum up this summer: the end of medical school. Anyways here are the memories for this summer.

Best Place Visited: Camiguin. What a wonderful island. Paradise with a laid back feel. Beaches, history, culture, waterfalls, hot springs, cold springs and majestic volcanoes it's all there in the second smallest Philippine province. I'm definitely coming back.

Best New Discovery, Rediscovered: Starbucks at Northwing SM for the fast WI.FI and for having plenty of wall sockets for charging laptops after an hour.

Highlight: Graduating from Medical School

Most Memorable Day: April 1 ,2010. The feeling of elation when internship ended!

Best Movie Watched: Tie between "Invictus" and "Up in the Air". Honorable Mention: "The Baader Meinhof Komplex"

Guilty Pleasure: Watching the Vampire Diaries and binge eating.

Best Book Read: Tie between South of the Border, West of the Sun by Haruki Murakami and The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larson. And two honorable mentions: Three Weeks with my Brother by Nicholas Sparks and Nine Stories by J.D. Salinger.

Most worth it Purchase: The Seven Narnia books by C.S. Lewis for only 385 php.

Song of the Summer: Nothing On You by B.o.B featuring Bruno Mars. As soon as I heard this song in Camiguin over that weekend I know this it! Catchy with a summer cool vibe that promotes chillaxin.

Best New Discovery, Gastronomic Delight: Halo-Halo from Razon's. Perfectly chilled ice, balanced sweetness with three unique ingredients - bananas, macapuno and leche flan - even more perfect after a hot humid day.

Feeling of the Summer: Accomplishment and moving on.

Best Fashion Accesory: Sanuk shoes for walking comfy and avoiding dust in between your toes

Special Mention: This summer has been the hottest ever and I was trying to spend of the time in air conditioned areas!

Till next summer.

High School Never Ends

Yeah of course it ended at around nine years ago. But high school culture continues to dictate the way we live in a sort of bizarre, inexplicable way. Kind of.

Well I got to thinking while driving back to Cebu City after a weekend getaway at a high school friend's farm and then frolic on the beach with grilling on Sunday on one of the towns on the North of Cebu. It was a at least a two to three hour drive. It was an awesome weekend by the way. Booze, pig outs, karaoke and good ol' Filipino hospitality. Most of all it was the ultimate catch up weekend. It was intimate but loud - since there were lots of laughter and the talking was non-stop. Nadia, Reggie and I have not seen each other for almost two years. Not counting those mini-reunions every Christmas season since the atmosphere during those gatherings does not really promote a chance of a heart to heart, mostly it's chit-chat and mingling with each other.

The topic was mostly about high school. You see though the three of us each belonged to a respective clique, we managed to become really close friends for we were united with one thing - gossip. Yeah. If we had the BlackBerries back then we would have given Gossip Girl if she ever existed some tight competition. And of strength was the power of mouth.

We still found out that the three of us still had animosities with the same people since high school. We somehow cannot shake off that even after ten years some people are still irritating and can get through your nerves via FaceBook. We still are entertained by anecdotes from those four years. Tales of droll, laugh out loud moments of growing up. I am still a big believer of the saying, "Being grown up isn't half as fun as growing up."

Basically high school was all about hormones and sadly most people and image was dictated by popularity. I guess in way my school it still had some politics regarding self image and personalities despite being labeled a high school whose students are cream of the crop.

Well you can never really leave high school totally in my opinion. High school just laid out the foundation of what the real world can be - mean and tough. High school was ruled by smart people, rich brats, lean athletes, beautiful people and those that did not really fit the mold were picked on. But part of the population of those that didn't really fit the mold didn't really care. I'd like to think that I didn't really categorize into those roles mostly considered popular by Philippine High School standards. Yes I was in the Top Ten of my class for four years but I wasn't that as hard working. Next I didn't play any sports that much, I just did so that I'd never have to suffer a low grade in Physical Education. Lastly I was awkward in high school. I had bushy hair, forehead acne and was one of the shortest boys in class. But I wasn't picked on. My edge was my personality and my mouth. I was small but I did not back down from a verbal fight and I was perceived as too frank for most tastes. I immersed myself reading books, watching movies and listening to the coolest pop songs.

Though I didn't really care much - a part of me still cared for that popularity bull crap and that was one of the reasons I drifted apart from my best friend in elementary school. He was picked on for being fat and then instead of coming to his defense, I walked the halls non-chalant as he was being teased and often times I would join in the revelry. Totally low on my part there. Way back in high school I socialized with both the so called popular crowd and those who were not. And I'm proud to say I still say hi to these people every time I bumped into them in public places.

After this weekend what we realized that some people do never change after high school. Some of them still give a shit on what other people think about their appearance or the way they dress. Some people still pick on the same people for being different after all these years. Some still as shallow as ever. The three of us are still guilty of being gossipy.

After all the real world whether we like it or not is dictated by high school politics. Somehow we still live in a world where superficiality overrule inner strength. People get jobs because they are "popular" a.k.a connections - also known as nepotism. And sometimes it takes more than brains to close deals or achieve goals.

But the only difference this time around is we are more experience and stronger. We can never really escape high school but we can choose to redeem ourselves by being more hard working and being extra nice to people that we wouldn't have been treating well if this were still high school.