Thought for Next Month

"I wish that I can have a life that is lived in the middle ground where contentment and love are found in the smallest details of people's lives".

This is what I learned today after finishing Nicholas Sparks's latest book "The Best of Me". This line was uttered by one of the characters.

These include spending time with your friends every week and laughing, eating a delicious dessert, trying out new cuisines, doing good on the first six months on your job evaluation, reading a good book on a rainy night while getting cozy on the couch, being entertained by a movie, home cooked lunch on Sundays with your healthy parents and siblings, walking the dogs, calling a pal from a different city to catch up, playing with your friends' kids amongst others.

As I will be turning a year older in two weeks. Yes, I am on my way of closing my late twenties, I've come to realize that, this is one of my birthday wishes this year.

Photo Credits: thingsweforget.blogspot.com

The Science of Sleep

Ever since I stopped working and started my sabbatical from the world of employment and wages I have been having tiny problems regarding sleep. Don't get me wrong I love sleep. But these are not life threatening medical problems.

Last month I've had dreams that are David Lynch-esque and it was both surreal and a bit upsetting. However I don't remember the bulk of those dreams but I swear it was like being stuck in Lynch's subconscious. And no matter how hard I try to remember them I usually just manage to picture one scene from such dreams when I wake up. It was like being in a black and white bleak world from the film "Eraserhead". Sometimes friends from high school, college, medical school and from the hospitals I've had worked know each other and mingle.

And the only one I can remember was the last dream I had two days ago. It was not as puzzling as "Mulholland Drive" but it was inexplicably odd. The theme was consistent like the rest of those dreams. It was set in medical school and it was Bioethics class and we were doing some kind of presentation about some medical issue I forgot. Yes, this is the class where we tackle euthanasia, abortion, patient confidentiality etc. Basically all those from the characters in "Grey's Anatomy" casually breach. The format was a talk show and I was the talk show host. It was set in an amphitheater (where we do these classes way back) and everybody from the school was there. The bizarre thing was though there were about a million pieces surrounding me I could not recognize any classmates nor schoolmates. However my professor was there. Then we were about to start. She then asked me if I was ready to start. And I said I was. Then suddenly, after I told her I was ready I had a mental block out right then and there. I could not remember for the love of God everything I was about to talk in front of the crowd. Nothing. I got nervous. John, one of my co-interns from post graduate internship who graduated from a different school, appeared and wished me luck. He then asked me why I missed his wedding(which happened a week ago) and then I woke up.

Right now I am having trouble falling asleep for two weeks now. I end up lying in bed for two to three hours before getting full shut eye. I want to have a normal circadian rhythm. I've tried everything what medical school has taught me. And still nothing is quite working yet. I've given up those afternoon naps and I read a lot of literature in bed.But I'm happy that a little progress has been made.

I guess this is the price you pay for having no work and no stress at all , no?

Of Jobs and Applications

When the application from the job that you have been holding out for like forever has been stalled for an indefinite period without time frame and all and you have resigned from your current job (its boring anyway) you breathe in, breathe out, keep calm, drink beer or whatever is in the fridge with alcohol content, do occasional joyrides and then listen to rock music. Everything is gonna be alright. Then repeat.
Let me take this opportunity to plug fun's (yup, fun is the name of their band) Some Nights album. Although they have become mainstream, they're sound is still refreshing. I have been drawn to this song again. Probably because I will become older in less than a month. Another way of the feeble subconsciousness dealing with the always inevitable change.

The Greatest of All Time

The Fed Express is on a roll! 17 Grand Slams including a 7th Record Wimbledon (tied with Pete Sampras), 5 US Opens, 4 Australian Opens and 1 French Open. He is not just the king of ANY surface but The Greatest of All Time. Unparalleled brilliance, a master class of his own right and timeless skills! Now he is back as World Number One and tied with Pete Sampras for the longest reign as the top ranked player (268 weeks). Congratulations Roger Federer! You totally deserve this!
This made my weekend. One of the best stuff that has happened this year!

Wassup

I haven't posted for eight weeks now. I just can't seem to find time to write anything interesting other than rumbling while being preoccupied by books and a couple of British TV shows. I am in this feeling of ambivalence between how swiftly time has passed by and then before going to bed I am shaking my head that time can't seem to run fast. I know right? Stupid.

Summer has come and gone. But I am welcoming the change of weather with open arms. This year I can feel the difference of temperatures and amount of rainfall as you would between the dry and the wet season. And rainfall has become my natural tranquilizer, making me sleep longer and deeper.

For me everything is just chilling, waiting and hoping. And in between those actions, are conversations fueled by alcohol inspired by sports, politics and third world problems, trash talking about the NBA play offs and tennis and reading interesting books. And I'm proud to say I got reacquainted with American History

And now I am battling another bout of insomnia with delusions of grandeur. Just don't get me started on the latter. That's all for now. Must get to bed and deal with those grand ideas later.
Here are my MUST LIST:

1.) Downton Abbey
2.) Jollibee's Criss Cut Fries In Zesty Cheese
3.) Cheese Top Burger from KFC
4.) Krispy Kreme's Special Edition Spiderman Doughnuts
5.) Sherlock
6.) Thor memes and jokes (I really find it funny. Especially Thor-un! LOL!)
7.) Matututuhan Mo Rin by Rocksteddy video
8.) One Direction (Guilty Pleasure)
9.) Weng-Weng from Alejandro's Filipino Resto
10.)Payless and their never ending bargains on shoes albeit generic.

P.S.
1.) I will definitely watch "The Amazing Spiderman" this weekend. Read a lot of positive reviews about the reboot.
2.) I can't decide whether to buy all the three books from "The Fifty Shades Trilogy". Sensibility says I'd be better off getting a copy of "1Q84" by Haruki Murakami or any book from A Song of Fire and Ice series.

First of Summer

Summer beckons! At least for me. As I have had previously mentioned in a couple of posts a month ago I just had concluded something that will make or break my career path, so I did not feel at all that it was summer except the heat.

Still the heat is on! Cebu City has been experiencing temperatures ranging from 30 to 35 degrees for the past six weeks already. Except on mid afternoons after lunch I am loving the temperature. Its the only time of the day that I cannot tolerate the humidity and the UV rays from my room that I take refuge in my sister's room for air conditioning. However the rest of the day it gets lovely. A fan, iced tea and a book or a TV rerun of old comedy shows keep me entertained on the dog days of summer.

So far I am feeling vibes and figments of those past childhood summers. My mom is on a cooking frenzy so rest assured almost every meal time there is something delicious on the table. Once we had homemade Spanish sardines, calamares on the weekends and occasionally have banana fritters made from scratch for snacks.

Other mini updates:

1.) I have a new favorite author and his name is Jeffrey Eugenides. In a span of nineteen years he has written three novels and edited one book of short stories. I finished "The Virgin Suicides" and it was mesmerizing and haunting. I am halfway through his latest book "The Marriage Plot" and so far I am finding the characters interesting in a non conventional way. After this I am planning on getting his second novel "Middlesex". Speaking of books I think this summer I will be able to read quite a number of books - as many or probably will exceed what I read during the Summer of 2007. Aside from Eugenides books (this will be the summer of Eugenides), what's on the list include Rolling Stone's Top 500 Greatest Albums of All Time, a biography of Michael Phelps (pumping up for the Olympics), a coffee table book on the Beatles, a Fitzgerald novel - I still could not decide between "This Side of Paradise" and "The Beautiful and the Damned" and I know that I am overly ambitious here - "Anna Karenina" by Leo Tolstoy.

2.) I have a feeling that 2012 will be a great year for movies. "The Avengers" kicked off summer with an entertaining kick ass visual feast. And now I am really excited for "The Amazing Spiderman" and "The Dark Knight Rises". Superhero movies will be brilliant this year! Avengers vs. Loki, check! Next up Spiderman vs. Lizard and the new trailer for "The Dark Knight Rises" makes me more excited to see it!

3.)I enjoyed American Idol's 60s night episode last night. I swore last year that I won't be watching this show anymore but since the videos in youtube are so accessible that you don't need to wait for the telecast on cable anymore I find myself wasting around two hours every week watching the live performances. My favorite performance of the night was Joshua Ledet and Phillip Phillips duet on the classic "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling". On paper it seems to sound horrendous but when they sang it - the odd combination of their voices - Joshua's high range of soul and falsetto blended well with Phillip's southern rock tone. They brought the house down. Joshua is indeed the underdog for this year. I predict that it will be a Jessica-Phillip showdown this year with Phillip claiming the crown because his adorable face have charmed every teenage American girl to vote for him. But a Jessica-Joshua finale is also possible. Phillip could start his own folk band! I can imagine him putting up an album that will sound like Mumford and Sons + Fleet Foxes and a dash of Kings of Leon.

4.) I still have five weeks of summer left. Who knows? It might be longer than expected or shorter than anticipated. But so far I am loving it. I have a lot of things to look forward to also! I won't divulge them here some might not happen but whatever happens I am perfectly fine waiting and hoping for better things.

That's About It

I haven't written for a month now. I have really been busy. Good kind of busy. Fulfilling type of busy. A lot of learning has happened during the past month. Right now though I feel that as if my life can be compared to a DVD being played on a DVD player then suddenly the pause button was pressed. And I am just in the sidelines watching or at least trying to wonder what will go on next. What button will be pressed? The rewind or the fast forward button. Surprisingly I am okay. More okay than what others might perceive. I enjoy my lull days where in I get to do whatever I want, have the options to go wherever but choose not to, and just think about nothing all day. In short I am the master of my time, and time is my friend. Yes ironically I still don't have all the time. And yes believe I try to make time for leisure but somehow it is still not possible. Maybe not now. I have to make peace with the fact that I will be having a late surge in going crazy and shit when I will be mid or late 30s. That is if death does not beat me to it. :-D. All I can say is being a doctor makes you poor in time and money but rich in knowledge. Some people tell me to lighten up and just go out and do things. But honestly I am just FINE here at home doing nothing, reading fiction and just sitting while listening to 90's songs. Yes my life is indeed in pause mode but I could not ask for more. I even argued to the universe late last night and saying what have I done to deserve something my parents are giving me. I don't deserve it but they won't budge anyway. I deserve something else but not this one. And one last word - I fucking seriously hate inspirational books. I am not amused of the fact that certain people teach other people how to run their lives. I admit I am one of those that need a tutor on how to manage life but still I'd prefer to do it o my own - make mistakes, fuck up sometimes (not ALL the time) and learn from it. These kind of books nag! Haha and yes this is what comes out when you stray from the transgressive fiction section in National.